Tuesday, July 17, 2012

The Solo Runner

I kinda feel like I'm grasping at straws here.  I'm struggling with my loneliness as a runner.

Running is the one sport where other people do not need to be involved in order for you to "play" and your gains and losses are based on your performance alone.  It is nice that you don't need any extra equipment in order for you to run (a good pair of shoes is never overrated) and you can run pretty much anywhere.  There is also something to be said when you just need to blow off some steam and the last thing you want to do is talk to someone else, it's perfectly ok for you to run as fast or as slow as you like while blaring Metallica through your ear buds.

In the same instance, if you don't have like-minded individuals whom you can count on for support or can call up/tweet/text to go running with, this journey can be quite lonely. in my honest opinion.  My friend Danielle that started her running journey shortly after I had, did hers with the assistance of group classes.  Her main class which lasted for 4 months, created some strong bonds between the runners and they regularly still get together to run or hang out, even though the class has been over for some weeks.

I would hear her fun stories about the group or be turned down for a run because she was hanging out with her "running ladies".  Over time I became envious of this relationship and support group she had with all these people.  All very different personalities, ages, experiences unified together with one common goal of running.  They did it together, challenged each other and laughed the whole way.

I want that same camaraderie.  That support.  Someone(s) I can call on for an in-promptu run some Wednesday night.  But I get the feeling that the only way I can get that is by paying for group classes, then I just feel like I'm trying to buy friends, how sad is that?

I've also been told that now that I'm in the blogging world to try and get to know fellow local bloggers and make some new friends that way.  Easier said than done!  How do you make friends with bloggers without sounding like a creepy, stalker fan?  Kinda scary, huh?  So my options seem to be "paying" for running friends or being thought of as a creepy, blog stalker?  Awesome...I'm feeling SO much better about this.  Yeah, those options kinda blow.

So what should I do?  What would you do?  How do I remedy this problem? 

I guess the issue that has prompted this and is staring me right in the face is that I have the Torchlight 8K Race on July 28th...and no one to be there with me.  No fellow running buddy, no family there to support me (races are not my families thing and my hubby will be working that night).  So I'm faced with this predicament that I will be at this race, pre- during and post-, all by myself.  Looking and feeling like a loner.  Le sigh.

Sorry that this post is a bit "debby downer", but this is something I've been battling for months and it now has finally come to a head.  We all naturally want a feeling of acceptance or camaraderie in something we feel so passionate about.  Like-minded individuals striving for goals and pushing each other to do better, be better.  It's just a matter of finding that open door to walk through and join the party.

Question for comment:  Have you felt this way? How did you find running buddies?  Suggestions for this lonely runner?


  1. a new follower. found you from a retweet from fitfluential. good luck to you!!!! cant wait to read more about your journey. if i could suggest adding a follow button on your blog that may help get more followers. If you would like I can blog about your blog to my followers.


    1. Hi Ashley! Thanks for coming by and reading! I appreciate your endorsement of my blog, I'm flattered! Thank you and I look forward to reading about your journey as well!

  2. I feel exactly the same way! We can be running buddies if you want (there ya go, sounds like the creepy stalker blog runner thing you were talking about). But in all seriousness, I see a running group that meets once a week run by my house in Van all the time and my boyfriend is always like "why don't you just talk to them" -- I give him a "if anyone talked to me when I was running on the street I'd just huff and puff by them" look.

    I am a lonely runner too! Nobody I know here runs (just moved here), so I feel your pain. Unfortunately no remedy for it yet, so let me know if you find a solution to our problem. But regardless, you're not alone in feeling this way!

    1. Haha...that made me giggle. Even though we are several hundred miles away (LOVE Vancouver, btw!) I would be more than honored to be a virtual running buddy! Someone where we can keep each other in check on getting our runs in and kudos for milestones passed.
      Congrats on getting started in running, it's been rewarding for me and I hope you are reaping the same rewards!

  3. I'm choosing creepy, blog stalker! LOL! ;)

    No, in all seriousness, I love running alone, it's my special time, but I started my blog because I needed to be able to talk about it and share my experiences and I think my family has heard enough! It's hard because I want to talk and talk about training and I know it's a lot for them sometimes...and sometimes I want to talk to a RUNNER, someone that really GETS IT!

    1. I know what you mean about wanting to talk about running and having no one to talk to about it. Sometimes you just need a sounding board, someone who will just listen and toss around ideas. My family gets that glazed look in their eyes when I talk about running, so I stop.