Saturday, June 2, 2012


So I know that this is a blog about running and fitness and goals and all of that good stuff.  However there are times when my life will spill over onto the blog, it's inevitable and may very well be messy at times.

I know that this blog is about my life and my daily quips about fitness goals and the like, I'm just talking about things unrelated to all of that.  Things that are going on that bother me or that I need guidance on from people other than the sphere of people closest to me.  You know what I'm talking about.  No holds barred truth or opinion either.  The need for someone to "be real" with me for a moment and give my head a check.

Speaking of "being real", when did all that change?  When did people start telling each other what they wanted to hear instead of being honest?  Why placate, why not go for the gusto and tell someone the truth?  Honesty can be freeing and it can be brutal, but without that to guide us we would all be walking around in a self-love haze.  But I digress.

The issue bothering me today is that for the first time I felt genuinely excluded by my best friend from an event.  It's her son's birthday party and I saw the party title come up in my Facebook feed (damn social media!), however I had no knowledge of this event.  So I checked the event page and sure enough, I was not listed as invited.  Strange, I'd been invited to all his previous birthdays and I'm pretty close with the family as a whole, so I was confused as to why I hadn't been invited.

So I wrote her a message and asked why I wasn't invited?  Was it only for their friends with kids?  Had I done something to warrant them not wanting me to be there?  I just found it odd.  Her reply was nice in the way that she didn't want me to feel excluded, she just felt that the parties should be kid centric and not so much about adults.  It's his birthday and a time to spend with kids his age.  Okay, I understand that, but ouch, that one hit below the belt.  This is the first time I felt genuinely left out because I didn't have a little one, a golden ticket of sorts.

To clarify my current life situation, I'm 33 years old and newly married (September 2011) and we don't have kids.  Now don't get me wrong, we are going to start working on that by the end of this year, but we wanted sometime together as a couple before we added to our household.  We are excited about having a family with two, maybe three kids, however we just aren't there yet.

I had and currently am being left out of birthday celebrations for my friends children for the same reason as given above.  I just wonder when that became an excuse?  Growing up my parents had adults at my birthday parties all the time, that is how these people became part of our family, by being at big celebrations.  They were friends of my parents, not of mine.  They had no kids, but were there to support and share in the festivities.  I just wonder when all of that changed and when friends that don't have kids that age (or kids at all) became those of a leprous nature?

Maybe I'm taking it too personally, but damn it, when did having a kid give you the master key to events in your friends/families lives?  There is already too much pressure to have kids and now there is this added twist to the situation.  I just feel like I'm being left out, that I don't have a golden ticket and that I will be left by the wayside to feel left out and defeated because I don't have the one thing that will include me in important aspects in my friends lives.  A child.

Damn...I need a drink.

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