Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Why worry?

It's Wednesday and yet it feels like it should be Friday.  This time change has really kicked me in the rear this week.  I feel like I've gone to battle all week just to get out of bed and I'm exhausted.  I'm drinking venti sized coffees (which is abnormal because I usually can't finish a grande!) and I've been feeling like a zombie all day.  Anybody else feeling like this too?

With all this and the fact that work has been bat-shit crazy lately, I haven't found the time in the days to be able to blog and it makes me upset and worried. 

Worried?  Why worry?


Well, if you haven't been able to figure it out by now, I'm a bit of a worry-wart.  I blame my mother for this, for introducing that seed of doubt that is now embedded in my brain that I'm not doing something quite right.

I worry about the usual adult stuff in life like bills and work and the ability to keep a roof over my head.

But I worry about a lot of other stuff too that seems trivial to others, but feels debilitating at times to me.

I worry about if I'm training well enough, or have the proper training schedule to get me to my goals.

I worry that I'm not improving enough or at all in my training to get better overall.

I worry that I'm not working out enough to maintain or continue to lose the weight that I need to.

I worry about my blog and if it is something to continue and if people would even miss it if I stopped.

I worry that I am not making any impact to anyone or anything.

::sigh::  I'm exhausted thinking about all of this.

People say don't worry about things you can't control and everything will work itself out.  Well, can't I control these things I listed?  Or am I worrying for no reason and I should just keep on trucking and believe I am doing my best each and every day and that is all that can be asked of me?

I guess I could do that, but what if I want more out of me and life?  Maybe I'm looking at things too narrow mindedly and I need to look at a much broader picture.  Huh.

Anyway.  I'm quickly coming up on my blogiversary this month.  One year of blogging and sharing my thoughts and experiences with everyone, something I was very apprehensive about doing for so long, but now can't imagine not doing.  I'm working on a fun post and first ever giveaway on my blog for that date.  So keep your eyes peeled for that, it will be pretty badass if I don't say so myself.

So on this Wednesday I will try to keep my worries at bay while I ponder the future and the direction I would like to take it in.  And drink my giant cup of coffee to keep me awake!

Question for you:  Do you worry?  A little or a lot like I apparently do?  What do you do to help mitigate those feelings?  Do they keep you up at night?

6 comments:

  1. Totally feel you on the worrying! I'm not sure there's much that can be done about it if you have that kind of personality. Those of us who dig deep into our own minds are just destined to question everything...including our own decisions. I try to focus on moving forward and taking the next step rather than on whether what I've already done will be okay.

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    1. Thank you Jennifer for that. It's tough to look at the big picture sometimes and a little reminder is needed sometimes. :)

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  2. I'm feeling you with the time-change-and-I-can't-peel-myself-out-of-bed thing. My alarm goes off but my other senses tell me I have another hour to get going. Ugh...

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    1. Oh yeah,I'm getting the feeling that I won't be normal again for a while. I hope I'm wrong about that! Good luck with getting back to normal as well!

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  3. As a big planner, I worry a lot about the little things as well, unfortunately. Someone told me when I'm feeling overwhelmed, to tell myself "all I can do, is all I can do." It does also help to take a step back and remember why you're doing what you're doing in the first place.

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    1. Very true Kim and thank you for that perspective!

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