Refocus

Well hello there, long time no see.  I know, I know.  I should write more, and I don't call back when you leave me messages.  I'm so bad about communication sometimes, I hate talking on the phone, I rarely text or email, and don't even get me started about Snapchat.  (Really, I feel so dumb trying to maneuver through that app. SO not a millennial.)

It's Christmas Eve and I feel inspired to write.  To post here.  And since that rarely happens, I thought I would ride that wave for as long as I could.

I've been gone a while.  A lost soul of sorts.  I've been dealing with a chronic physical issue for over a year that still has no diagnosis, only more questions with no answers.  Due to this physical issue I have done far less working out than I'd like and even less running.  Though I have been able to make some strides this year with working out and losing weight I still have a long ways to go.  

In April I started Tone It Up and it was a breath of fresh air for me.  I was able to workout at home, make nutritious meals that my whole family could eat and in a matter of 3 months I lost over 20 pounds.  Something I haven't been able to duplicate since then as my physical ailments came back with a venegence and it makes my ability to workout very difficult, if not impossible.

I ran a few races this year and had a great time, but I didn't make any breakthroughs or achieve any better results because of my lack of training overall.  Something I am hoping to change this year.

Which leads me to the title of this post, refocus, which means to me that I will be making some changes this year and putting my life and hobbies/goals back into focus.  I have been lost along my way for a couple of years now, for many reasons (or excuses), which ever you choose to use. Regardless, I haven't been "here" and it's something I have noticed and am making the concerted effort to change.  I want ME back.  I want to be present and feed what my soul is hungry for, and that is connection.  To myself, to what is around me, to my family, to my friends.  I need to ground myself and fight for what I want and need for and of myself.  This year is about change.  This year is about giving a shit and not giving up on myself.  I have felt myself spiral in and out of control all this year and most of last year and I'm done. Done, done, DONE with feeling like this.  It stops and stops now.

I am ready to flash my confidence again.  I'm ready to take back what is mine.  I am looking forward and up this coming year and I seriously cannot wait to attack this coming month.  I have a lot I am doing, including a refocusing of this blog with more posts about my coming journey.  What is that journey you ask?  Ahhh...I'm not giving it up that easily.  You've gotta wait and come back to see what I am up to and what changes I'm making.  

Until then, enjoy your holidays and please have a safe New Year everyone.  Let's make it to the new year together, so please drive safe and sober, or take an Uber.  I can't wait to see you all soon!  Merry Christmas!!

Good to your "self" - Week Four: Empower

It's Wednesday already and that means its the final installment of my body series Be Good to Your "Self" project. It's been a humbling and eye opening experience for me and I hope you all have had a chance to think about and look at yourself in more positive ways.

Today's final topic is not actually about a body feature at all. It's about your personality, another part of your self that people see that isn't physical but can be torn down by others just as easily. Our personalities come through with everything that we do. How we treat people, how we dress, what type of career path we take, and so on. What we are confident in and how we carry ourselves gets projected in the physical sense all the time. Our personality takes on a physical persona and people view that as a physical part of our "self".

Good to your "self" - Week Three: Embrace

Well, we are three weeks into this body series Be Good to Your "Self" project, where we are talking about what we love or appreciate about ourselves. The first week was Engage, where we talked about our best facial feature, the second week was Enjoy, where we talked about our best body feature. This week is along the theme of acceptance and appreciation, but it's about the thing we are pushing against, our flaws.

I know, how can talking about flaws be positive? Well, it's all about perspective. We can talk about positive things in negative ways and make the whole conversation negative, it's all about structure and wording. I have flaws, just like everyone else. I see them every time I look in the mirror. I know exactly where they are and my eyes go to that point every time I go in front of the mirror. It's like my sub-conscious is keeping tabs on them to make sure I'm reminded. "Is it still there? Oh yep, right where it was before." Yes, they are still there but you know what happens? I leave my place in front of the mirror and get on with my life.

Yes, life still goes on even though I have flaws and everyone can see them! I'll wait and let you process that for a second, go ahead, I'm patient.

Good to your "self" - Week two: Enjoy

I hope you all are having a great week so far, it is Wednesday, we're half way to the weekend! Today's post is the second installment of Be Good to Your "Self" project where the hope is that you read and share the great things about you, instead of focusing on what you want to change.

So today we will talk about the second word from the list I had provided in my previous post. To recap, the positive "E" words are: Engage, Enjoy, Embrace and Empower. We covered Engage last week, so this week we will talk about Enjoy. 

There have been very few times in my life that I've been told that I need to enjoy my body, that I need to be thankful and happy with what I have, I've always been told that there is something "wrong" that needs to be fixed. Whether it be the length or style of my hair, needing to wear make up, working out to lose weight, get a tan because my skins too pasty, etc. There has always been something about me that needed to change. 

But why? And for who's benefit, yours or mine?

Good to your "self" - Week one: Engage

Today is the first of the four installments of the Be Good to Your "Self" project where I want us to explore the wonderful things that make each of us unique and perfectly us. When I was thinking about this idea, I wanted to concentrate on aspects of our bodies and our personalities and four words kept cycling through my head - engage, enjoy, embrace, empower. Not only are they all "E" words (remarkably) but they all have positive meanings to them, no negativity. That's what I wanted to promote in this whole dialogue, even when we talk about something we don't like, I want you (and me!) to talk about it in a positive light. More on that later.

So today we will talk about the first of the four words that will be the theme of each of the posts, engage. By definition, engage means: occupy, attract, or involve (someone's interest or attention). When we enter a room with people in it, what is the first thing we look at? Their face and surrounding area. That information will give you a quick read on the "climate" of the situation you are walking into because our faces show our emotions and those signs can advise you how to approach those situations. So if you walk into a room with people smiling and conversing in a lively way, it feels more welcoming and light-hearted giving you the feeling of comfort where you can engage with people. Whereas if you walk into a room with people scowling, not talking to each other or making eye contact, you feel a lot more defensive and are less likely to make the effort to engage with those around you.